Thursday, July 10, 2008

12 steps to a MELTY Bichon

1]Put me somewhere comfy. Like a bed. A couch will do in a pinch.
2]Pet me. Head to tail. No skimping!
3]Scratch behind my ears. GENTLY. I use those things, people.
4]Pet my face. Slow gentle scratch circles to my cheeks, under my chin, over the nose, between the eyes and over the head. This does help to drain my sinuses. I'm a snotty little dog.
5]If you are going to rub my ears, be gentle and do NOT EVER BLOW in my ear. It hurts like a mofo. And... I shouldn't have to say this but... DON'T BITE MY EAR. (Wendy, you know who you are.)
By now I will probably start to swallow more. When Bichons get sleepy, they swallow a lot. Massages are relaxing and they make us sleepy.
6]Continue petting.
7]Don't forget the legs, stretch them gently.
8]Now my butt. Yeah, I said butt. Walking on my hind legs makes my butt muscles tired. If you insist on making me dance, I insist on making you pet my butt. Buttpetter.
9] Optional- Now, I love having my paw pads touched and massaged, but JD hates it. JD's annoyance is FUNNY. So go with the paw petting. DEFINITELY.
10] Scratch my back. It itches. You know how you see Bichons throw themselves on their backs and squirm around? Yeah, that's from neglect. Lazy 2leggeds are cheap with the backscratches. Scratch gently at the side of my spine down to the tip of my tail.
11] Back to petting. Gentle this time.
12]Tell me you love me and list the things you are going to buy for me. Speak softly I might be asleep...
contributors: JD. Wendy
do me
(NOTE: that awful blanket thing that JD is napping on is in a HOTEL. A cheap one. Silvieon2 has way better taste.)

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