Monday, October 26, 2009
2legges and THEIR fixations!
Oy. I overheard the momma talking to daddy. Grrr.... She is calling our groomer and making an appointment.
I sniffed me. I smell great, I am NOT dirty. I only rolled in that stuff outside that one time ... and momma wiped me down with that weird damp towel thingie that supposedly cleans you up without making you wet all over.
So... why the groomer? Oh, that is rich...my curls over my eyes make momma's eyes itch. Aha. I think she is haircut happy.
Have you noticed how "fixated" your 2legged is on "clean"? Mine seems to have OCD about clean.
There is a canine flu going around. Know what that means at my house??? Wipes. Antiseptic wipes. We hate them, we stink like medicine. We get wiped down after walks, God forbid anyone touches us... and every couple of days, our toys end up de-smelled and in the dishwasher or washing machine... It is insane.
Yesterday, I came in from outside and momma went crazy. She grabbed me and "removed" what she deemed to be "filth" off my back. Filth... Her plant dropped stuff on my back and I get into trouble for it. It is so true... there is no "fair"... anywhere but at the county seat...
I watched momma yesterday. I made a point of watching her wash her hands... I stopped counting after 7... We all know that anything more than 7 is a LOT. Then last night, she is putting on lotion whining about her dry hands... All together now... "DUH"!
But I do have to confess something... [please do not tell JD or Wendy] I like getting a pawssage with lotion. I do. It just feels great. For some reason, if you nap after, you are not all slippery when you wake up. But if you don't nap... your paws are slippery.
Both JD and Wendy hate lotion.... JD rubs off even make believe lotion. Momma has a cruel streak... she pretends she has lotions and rubs her hands together and then pets JD. That sends him into a frenzy and he "rubs off" the pretend lotion all over the rugs, by rolling on his back like a mad dog. All I can do is shake my head...
Back to this looming grooming issue...how to get out of it... Hmmm maybe I can use this dog flu germ phobia.... let me think... maybe, just maybe a sniffle and a sneeze will do it... I have to be careful and played just right. Don't want to overplay my paw....
etttttchew..... [just rehearsing]