Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Things I am CALLED

Ok. I cannot be the only Bichon with this problem. I am sure there are a few of you out there with the same issue. It is the humans. The 2legged ones. Just when you think you understand their language, you think you have leaned all the appropriate responses, they call you with some of the weirdest names! I really mean weird. Ehmm. Out of love I will protect the identity of the 2 legged ones that have said these things to me, but honestly! And I know they have done the same thing to JD and to Wendy. JD just ignores most of the stuff, Wendy walks away (And who can blame her??) I am left scratching my head as to the meaning of the comment and what the appropriate response would be. This is a sample of what I hear:

"Hi there powderpuff...." Powderpuff? Am I supposed to dip myself in something and fling myself at their face?
"Liquorish lips" Ha. How droll, I suppose a compliment if you like the stuff. I smelled it-Ick nasty nasty nasty, so NOT a compliment by me.
"Cupcake" ??? SO where is my frosting? When was the last time you peeled paper off my bottom? { ok- nevermind.}
"Yummy Tummy." Ok, that is revolting on so many levels I just don't know where to begin.
"Sugar Bugger." Ditto above sentiment- squared. Just stop it. Please.
"Bubelah." Ok I like that one.
"Zucchero filato." Do I look like spun sugar? I would be sooo sticky and we all know how you feel about a sticky Bichon!
"Fuzzy baby" Gee, I should call you "shaved human?"
This one simply makes NO SENSE! "Sugar lump of dirt" Yea, if you know what it means, let me in on it.
"Bitching Frizzie" Yawn. Do they need more proof your college and post grad education was a waste????
JD gets "Lover boy". And you know this how? Never mind I don't want to know.
"Miss Patoush" ok. I get this when I refuse to move. How is being called Miss Patoush going to motivate me to move?
OK, then there is a whole group of... boring unimaginative, overused, obnoxious and obvious nicknames. Addressing all that fit in that category with a general comment: If you cannot committ to thinking of a better nickname, call me by my given name instead! So no more, "Furball" "Cottontail" "Qtip" "Fluff monster" and the like. ok?
Oh oh oh I cannot forget this one. "Pisher King." JD got called that. All 3 of us shook our heads.
Do I make my point? Enough with the dumb names!!!!
Miss 'vie to you!

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