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Friday, April 10, 2015

Trauma or Drama?

New game. We have invented for Momma. Shhhhh we are trying this so she does not snap and lose what is left of her little mind.

It has been a tough April already.  And it followed a very tough March. So... go along and play along

The game is simple. Why it is called TRAUMA or DRAMA will become self evident.

We have had a lot of both at our house lately.  This "game" is designed to give momma a sense of perspective so she does not crumble. Bottom line, the cupcake needs to toughen up.

Everything in the house is covered in a cloud of fine dust. Blame the carpet removal? Blame the hardwood floor install? Blame the painter, the carpenter...the granite installers.... Blame everyone! Cough, clean, cough...
Trauma or drama?________________

Shower doors delivered without handles.
Shower door installed improperly because the handles were not there.
Shower doors re-installed... Initial time line as projected 10 days. Actual time line... 5 weeks.
Trauma or drama?________________

Granite gets installed...almost.,.. Two pieces did not match. Ohhhhh so many phone calls.
Installer agrees with momma. 4 days later... it gets done...
Trauma or drama?________________

Sink and faucet issues. Hoomans have some real issues about matching and fitting in and blah blah..
All I know is that things had to be returned, exchanged, re set, and ultimately it got done, but not without many many discussions, measurements, talks, phone calls...
Trauma or drama?________________

Momma gets the flu... Down for the count.... She is post op and none of us want to go through more surgery with her so we all hold our breath and listen to her breathing... It's hard not to laugh at her gravely voice. She is clueless... she is trying to "clean up" and is upset she is woozy and dizzy. Don't say it... I was thinking the same thing, I know, right?
Trauma or drama?________________

Cosmo. Crazy boy. Crazy like a fox, he has her completely won over. He steals our food if he is given a chance. I am calling this one. TRAUMA. but you can vote.
Trauma or drama?________________

JD's senior exam is not "pristine" That boy needs a diet change and some immediate help with his liver function. Momma is gutted. Daddy gets lectured on what will be allowed.
Trauma or drama?________________

JD's recheck shows that things are going better and a little more tweaking with his diet should be all that is needed. Now the woman is looking at our diet! Oh dear... will it ever stop?
Trauma or drama?________________

JD develops what appears to be a funky white spot on his left eye. Momma calls it. And she turns out to be right...CATARACT. Off to Dr Brad.  SURGERY, immediately. Need I ask?
Trauma or drama?________________

JD comes home poodle pawed, with a cone of shame, and looking ever so PATH ethic...
Trauma or drama?________________

JD gets drops and the boy refuses to eat until he is de-coned.  Nice play JD.
Trauma or drama?________________

JD hates the cone, can't navigate well up and down steps, Takes a misstep and starts limping.
now we have... JD in a cone, post up, poodle pawed and limping.... Momma falls completely apart. She has been carrying him up and down and that boy gives orders like a pro.
Trauma or drama?________________

Finally the cone comes off, but the recovery is derailed when MR JD somehow injures his surgical site and starts winking and keeping his eye closed. Momma loses it.
Trauma or drama?________________

JD is back in a cone, post up, poodle pawed and limping and not able to get groomed... and today we are headed back to Dr Brad, Hopefully the new eye drops have fixed the damage,  If not... ther is a shot they give in the eye.... Oh dear.... that will be DRAMA.....!!!!!!! Wonder if he can put something in momma's head and fix her.,. Every time she looks at him, she chokes up.
Right now he could ask for and probably get anything he wants from her.
Trauma or drama?________________

The Wendy came in from outside with some weird stuff on her butt. From far away momma thought it was blood. This is what we call jumping to delusions. Turned out to be a piece of red string, who knows where it came from. But the way that woman reacted, she went int ER mode. Before she even got close to the Wendy, there were warm compresses and meds and...phones and er numbers... I say momma is losing it... Drama...drama... drama. And after it was all over... and she know everything was fine... that woman fell apart!  BUT EVERYTHING WAS FINE!  If only she made sense, know what I mean????
Trauma or drama?________________

Cosmo takes off when fired gardener shows up on Easter day trying to make amends for never showing up to do the clean up etc etc... By take off , I mean that Cosmo actually ran out and had to be chased....  Soooo Cosmo is a runner... Moi?  Nahh why would I ever leave?  The Wendy, JD and I know better. Oh yuh, I forgot. JD did that running bit once.,. ended up in a squad car with a Chesapeake police officer and momma was, in a nightgown all over the neighborhood crying...

Old gardener is OUT.. New gardener has been scared straight by momma re OUR safety.
Those 3 minutes Cosmo was running...
Trauma or drama?________________

Finding out that some rodent chewed a hole in the drain hose of the dishwasher under the house and caused a leak....AGAIN....
Trauma or drama?________________

Momma spotted a chameleon in the garage and freaked out...that thing ran out like his butt was on fire.
Trauma or drama?________________

Weird beeping noise that drove momma crazy for about 3 hrs... stooopid roomba stuck under the couch...Trauma or drama?________________

I better stop, I am depressing myself... this is a mere smattering of what has been going on.  There has been lots more.  But that is life.  I am ever so grateful I chose tail over thumbs.  I only have one responsibility and I do take it seriously I  twirl my tail and take care of my hoomans with wags and licks and fluffytude.

I am hoping things settle down. WAYYYYY down.  I am owed an Easter and a Passover. Momma is healthing up. She is not wheezing and she is back drinking her 'puccino which means her yucks are over,

I leave the trauma or drama to the momma... and daddy... by default...


1 comment:

Jeanne Pursell said...

Wow 'vie! Nobody could top ALL of that drama! We think you should pitch a mini-series deal or better still...a major motion picture. What is wrong with Cosmo...he needs to get with the program. LadyBug was a runner when she first came to us...but she learned! Cosmo will too...we are sure of it. Hope things improve and we are glad momma is feeling better!

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