What does a girl have to do to get heard around here?
I have stuff to stay and more importantly I have stuff that needs to be heard!
I need all eyes and ears on me and I have taken center stage.
Hoomans HUSH! Pay attention!
Momma. Put your stuff down and pay attention. Stop your OCD cleaning.
Twice in the last week I have witnessed some rather disturbing behavior.
Both times, it involved the boys.
Yes, the boys. Cosmo and JD.
I preface this objection with the assertion that I am not motivated by jealousy in bringing this up, but rather from sensing an alarming trend that cannot be allowed to be continued. Also, I cannot bear the thought that someone would interpret my silence as tacit consent. [Daddy.... hmmm]
Cosmo went garbage surfing. A grave offense in this home. To date it's one of the mortal offenses. Meaning it kills momma on so many levels that she feels like a complete failure. She questions everything. It triggers crisis of confidence on the food front, discipline front, inadequacy front... you get the drift.
I would never dare to garbage surf! EVAH!
You have to be nuts to do it considering the aftermath.
Yet. Cosmo did it. In front of them, in plain sight, He went into the trash and stole a chicken bone. The horror! The panic! The confrontation between Cosmo and daddy! Scary stuff.
But scarier was the "ploy" daddy used to get the bone back.
He offered Cosmo a huge piece of turkey jerky! What the hey?????!!!
Equity where are you? Fairness are you dead?
Daddy you are rewarding the little terrorist?
Even with the exchange offer, Cosmo had to be forcibly made to comply. And then he got half of that treat. We, the dogs who followed the law... got nothing.
It was all so wrong that I was speechless. Daddy, you rewarded him for
garbage surfing. I don't care what else you call it, or however you want to justify it, I do not accept your reasoning. Maybe a punctured gut would have taught that little scofflaw not to violate house rules.
The rest of us... should have gotten a treat and he should have been without. I am just saying.
Momma. JD spitting his pills out 3 times in a row should not trigger you to go find more and more delicious yummies to pill him with.
You know how to put that pill down his throat. Just do it!
Are you both acting crazy because they are boys? Or have both of you taken leave of your senses?
Buckle up buttercups. I expect better from both of you.
I will call you out. And shame you.
PS. JD just marked your wastebasket. He better not be getting a treat because
I will create a new lake.